Warning: Death, violence, and spoilers!
Elite assassin turned prisoner, inmate turned preschool teacher, looking for love before she becomes too old. Rita will defend these school children at any cost and take on any attacker… unless it so happens that he’s a hottie.
It’s Playtime!
Rita, a former legendary assassin known throughout the criminal underworld, has been a prisoner of the state for over a year now. A sentence that would last for several lifetimes over due to her illicit killings. But, instead of being incarcerated in the traditional sense, she’s been given a most particular proposal: become a preschool teacher for Japan’s billionaire elite children and have her sentence reduced. At Kindergarten Noir, her designation is Convict No. 999, but to the smiling children she unknowingly protects, she’s commonly referred to as Rita-senpai.
Life Can Be A Real Jungle Gym
Now this writer knows what you’re thinking: Rita’s a cold-blooded killer, and she’s tasked to protect children? From who? Well, apparently, EVERYBODY! We’ve got gangsters, yakuza, ninjas, lone gunmen and swordsmen having it in for these kids because nothing beats a sweet bounty on an easy target… Or, so they thought. Rita’s got the skills, the weapons, and the playground at her disposal to make lunchables out of these would-be hitmen. Her wits are sharp and her aim is true, but her heart… Well, we can’t blame her for wanting more out of life, especially when the only men she meets nowadays are through an iron sight. If Rita manages to corner a hitman and he turns out to be a hottie, there’s a chance for true romance or an opportunity for him to get clipped if it turns out he eats his ramen in the wrong order.
Finger Painting, Clean Up the Brass, Naptime
Principal Erina is a former soldier and is the head of Kindergarten Noir. She’s been tasked to oversee the school as the principal, but is also the acting warden for all the convicts that have taken the same seal as Rita. She scolds Rita for not dispatching the hitmen more quietly away from the children and has her placed as a subordinate with Doug, a high-profile con artist now serving out his sentence as her co-teacher in the Dandelion class. The tables turn almost immediately when Doug gets kidnapped and Rita forces herself to rescue that no-good swindler; an easy save considering there weren’t any handsome hijackers. A sweet save among colleagues gave way to a budding relationship between the two, followed by an immediate scolding by the principal for being so careless.
Love is a Battlefield
No blossoming courtship is complete without a potential love triangle. Kindergarten Noir enlists another teacher in the Dandelion class: Hana Bradley, a serial bomber and the youngest daughter of the Bradley family of assassins, who now completes the trio and is Rita’s junior. Hana plays a sketchy role at first, trying to play innocent with Rita and Doug so that they might fall for her plea for help. As it stands, both she and her older brother were forced into the family business of assassins. Never truly accepting their roles, Hana flees her family with the help of her brother, but not before he gets captured. Now she’s faced with an ultimatum: keep running, which would most likely spell doom for her brother, or save him by luring Rita and Doug into a trap with the Bradley family.
Final Thoughts
You Chiba is a manga artist from Gunma Prefecture. Her genre of manga varies from action, comedy, romance, and sports. In 2023, Kindergarten Wars, the first volume, was released and was viewed as the third manga to be published on the Shonen JUMP app, and then in 2024, it was featured at JUMP FESTA. You’s other publications include Dricam!! (Manga) Star no Star (One-Shot), Chippoke na Sannin (One-Shot), all of which have a mix of charmingly childish humor and unrelenting mayhem, just like KW.
This series has its charm with its comedic one-offs. So even though it has some fast-paced moments, it doesn’t give much to a direct path for storytelling, just hang in there because class is in session, and it’s about to get better.
imma have to read that